C'ville Entremom

Everyone knows that a healthy plant needs the right combination of elements to thrive: water, sunlight, and possibly some plant food. But, we often overlook something that can be as important as food or water: pruning. A well-pruned plant or tree is healthier, yields more fruit and/or flowers, and has more opportunity for growth. 

So what does pruning have to do with people? We are not so different from any other living organism. Old habits can hang off us like dead leaves or branches and eventually become toxic if not addressed. As busy working moms, we all have had the experience of too much on our plate or being at our wits end with business deadlines, housekeeping, field trip slips and book orders. The majority of what is on our plate needs to be there, but somewhere between landing that new client and making dinner, there are some filler tasks that just need to go. I haven’t run into a mom yet who would admit that EVERYTHING on their plate was both necessary and in line with their values. It’s time to prune off the dead in order to make room for new growth and more fruitful activities.

 Here are some questions to ask yourself if you are not sure if you need to prune:

 1-Do you accept duties or roles out of guilt?

 2-Do you say “yes” when you mean “no?”

 3-Do you find yourself browsing the celebrity gossip web sites or doing other non-work related tasks during your designated work hours?

 4-Have you put someone you love on hold to give your time to something you “dread?”

 5-Do you make a habit of making plans you later regret?

 6-Do you often over-commit both work and family schedules?

 If you answered “yes” to two or more of these questions, here are a few easy steps you can begin to take that will help you minimize unwanted obligations and relationships so that you can focus on what’s most important:

• Create awareness of your values and then only accept people and activities that are in line with those values. For example, if you’re involved in a stressful friendship/relationship or an activity that drains your energy and time, prune it out. Eliminating these time and energy “vampires” can instantly free up your to-do list and create a more peaceful and grounded life.
• Don’t say “yes” when you mean “no.” If you’re going to dread going to the party, or it’s going to stress you out trying to fit the new volunteer position in your busy schedule, don’t do it. I have a rule I share with all of my clients, Do it with JOY or don’t do it!  If your business and family are most important to you, then give them your undivided attention and eliminate everything else that’s not in line with your values. Some things that do not make the “honoring your values” list are: “Everyone else is doing it,” “I feel obligated,” “I should,” or “What will everyone say/do?”
• Take a careful look at every moment of designated work time and prune out activities that are not 100% business related or revenue producing. One of the biggest struggles for working moms is the careful balance of work and home. Being distracted by “housekeeping” tasks, social outings, or big home projects can be areas to prune that will help increase productivity. Instead of cleaning the closets out during work hours, turn it into family time and an opportunity to discuss the value of passing things on that we no longer use for the benefit of others. Also, create an orderly workspace, so you spend less time cleaning/organizing and more time producing. 

Get out those pruning sheers and re-evaluate what you are spending your time and energy on.  You may be surprised by what you need to eliminate from your world. The result of proper pruning will be a more peaceful and fruitful life. 

 Sharon Hart is a life coach specializing in coaching women in transition. Through her company, Birth Your Dream Life Coaching, Sharon has helped countless clients find their true passions, change careers, start businesses, find balance, and connect with motherhood in a deeper way. For more information, visit her web site or contact Sharon at Sharon@birthyourdreamlife.com.

 

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This entry was posted on Thursday, October 8th, 2009 at 1:04 pm and is filed under Guest Columns, Local Resources. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.